I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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