My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I supernannyed him into submission
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
