Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
My ass is underappreciated
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize