you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize