party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
