I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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