White coat. Heels.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
