Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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