Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
