He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
