so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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