Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
