I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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