sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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