i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
