Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
