her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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