I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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