so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
