Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
