Do you still have your period?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize
