why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
