Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Oh god it's open bar.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
