Please don't use social media to get back at me.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
