You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Reggie can tackle my bush.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
