Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
