But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
