Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
