Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize