May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
