STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
