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• (954): View more from Florida

  Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  That Cesar Milan is captivating

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• (585): View more from New York

  She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.

  (585): View more from New York

  Aren't divorce parties fun?

  (1-585): View more from New York

  You and I have very different definitions of fun.

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes

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• (951): View more from California

  Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening

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