i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Randomize