Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhhâ€
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