I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
