We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
