Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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