sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize