he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
