actually, I'm a sock model
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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