It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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