doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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