the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Randomize
