Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Randomize
