no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Randomize
