soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
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