She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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