please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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