I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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