Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize