You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
